the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
