It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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