hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
