some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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