drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
