something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
