I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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