Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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