haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize