You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
