We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Randomize
