some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
