her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
