so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
