Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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