I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
My dick has a subreddit
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
