I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
