Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
