Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
