Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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