He is such a slut. More and more my type.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
