is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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