And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
