Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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