it was like eating out sand paper
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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