Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Duck Duck Cougar?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
