I cockslap morals
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
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