Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
