Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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