Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
he shaved USA in his pubs
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
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