My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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