I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
