That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
