better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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