i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
