OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Randomize
