im six kinds of drunk right now
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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