Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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