Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
