we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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