who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
