I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
