ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
