This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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