Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Everything about him screamed your future.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
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