Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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