So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
