I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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