I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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