He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
